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Self-Love Vs. Selfishness

Updated: Sep 14, 2023

SELFISH - concerned excessively or exclusively with oneself

(Merriam-Webster)



Is it possible to be self-compassionate and selfish at the same time? More importantly, how does our self-love (or lack thereof) affect our daily living?


It is actually more beneficial to all of our relationships to practice self-love than it is not to. Caring for ourselves provides us with the energy we need to care for others.



How might we experience self-love?


A personal check-in is a simple way to show ourselves love and kindness. This is totally noncommittal and a great way to improve self-awareness. You can do this by paying attention to your thoughts and recognizing how you talk to yourself. Do you say words that are condemning? Do you magnify negative aspects of your life? Do you blame yourself for things that go wrong?


An example could be when we are feeling disappointed about a mistake we make at work. When we begin to assign harsh labels and tell ourselves we aren’t capable of doing a good job, this can show up at home and in so many other areas of our lives.


We can shift the narrative by acknowledging our negative self-talk and working to correct it. Begin by finding kind adjectives to describe "you".


It’s okay that you received low marks on that assignment.

You did your best.


Changing patterns of thought can take some time. Beginning to recognize a negative thought pattern is a great first step.



SELFISH? I think not. Instead, we are filling up our self-love piggy banks.


Stock photo handmade pink ceramic piggy bank

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